We auditioned two other drummers. Julia Cleveland
is the house drummer at The Rex
and Leanne Davies
who is a brilliant painter and drummer. We chose Justin. Are we racist? Sexist? Is Salman Rushdie
still alive? Probably. One of us has recently been doing work for the Freemasons
, not joking. He likes them. Their principles are optimistic and their symbols are elegant, but it’s boys only. Is that wrong? Is a boys only club dedicated to fighting evil wrong? Why not join the Rotary which is co-ed? Their Four Way Test
is basically everything awesome about The Bible
in 0.001% of the blah, blah. Here’s a quick interview with Justin and you decide.
Q1. If this was an interview for Rolling Stone magazine and the interviewer had just asked the dumbest cliche question in a series of dumb questions and you took the opportunity to say what you really think what would that be?
Ok first off asshole, thanks for taking the time to interview me. Second, you seem like a really nice man or woman but when it comes to choosing questions and it comes to YOU choosing them, a good questions chooser you are not. (Drop the mic. Interviewer crushed.)
Q2. If you were a billionaire with no responsibilities what would you be doing right now?
I admire the efforts Bill and Melinda Gates so I’d probably be a full on rapist. NO, NO, NO! You’re writing that down wrong! A philanthropist, a phil-an-thro-pist! Geez.
Q3. What’s your favourite comfort food?
Comfort pie. One part chopped couch, two parts blanket and a pinch of trashy tv.
Q4. What’s wrong with you?
I play drums for no money. It’s a disease. The first step is admitting you have a problem.
Q5. If you had a time machine, when and where in the past would you go and what are your thoughts on the physics of time travel?
Can I only go into the past? I’d want to go to the future. Let’s say 40 years so I’m not totally lost. Justin Bieber would hosting the 127th Oscars and I could be like, “I know him! He was a pop music singing douchebag in my day.”
I’m a tech-enthusiast so I’d want to see the true beginnings of AI. I’m excited, fascinated and terrified by that. I think we’re about 30 years away from the lines beginning to blur between man and machine. And my thoughts on time travel? It’s probably possible in some technical way like we could maybe send a dozen electrons into the future by half a second. But I don’t think it’ll ever be possible for us human folk.
Q6. If your doctor just told you, you have 6 months to live what would you say to her?
That’s amazing! Normally I live each day like it’s my last. What a gift, Doc. What a gift.
Q7. How big are you?
I just showed you like five minutes ago in the bathroom. What? Now you want to see it again? You know already. Small. Embarrassingly small!
Q8. Where’s Osama Bin Laden?
Answer A: Let’s plan a night to watch Zero Dark Thirty.
Answer B: Osama Bin Bama-Care. I don’t really know what that means but it feels right.
Q9. If you could change society in one way what would it be?
Equal pay for women. And making this question #1.
Q10. Anything you wanna add?
I can only hope to be half the drummer that Scott was. I had the honour of seeing him play with Dirty Penny once and I was blown away! Meeting him briefly after the show, I could tell that he had a great personality and a kind heart. I’ll try to do you proud Scott. Rest in peace.